Sexual Piercings, Nipples and Genital Piercings are by far one of the most puzzled over piercings. I’ve always amazed by how people react when I say yes, I do pierce nipples and genitals. The thing is that often after they have gotten past the shock and awe of the subject and I begin to discuss the advantages of genital piercings and nipple piercings, you will notice a little light bulb go off. One of those “Oh, I get it moments and now that I understand it a little better, I’m intrigued by it.” So, for this installment, I thought I’d cover some of the motivations, advantages, misconceived notions and disadvantages of Sexual Piercings.
First off I would like to point out that much of will be talking about is of an adult nature, subjects will cover sexuality, anatomy, and the effect of body jewelry during sex. So, it might not be suitable for those that are considered to be minors or those that are easily offended. Just like genital piercings, this is not for everyone. That and since these blogs for a large part are targeted to my cliental, I must clearly state that I will not do any piercing that I consider sexual including nipples and the genital area on anyone under the age of 18. I should further point out that no piercer that claims to be a professional should either. There is a lot of issues involved with sexual development and whether or not it would be considered sexual assault of a minor.
With that said and everyone forewarned let’s get to it. I think for a majority of people the most puzzling aspect of genital and nipple piercing is why someone would go through the pain of getting the piercing. The reality is that often, though the area is very sensitive, the pain is only slight more or even less than other areas of the body. Like any piercing there will be pain ranging from mild to very uncomfortable but the reality is that it is always a short term experience only lasting in most cases a few seconds. With genital piercing especially the pain is very short. Unlike other piercings where there might be throbbing pain for up to 10 or 15 minutes after the piercing is done, with genitals the body’s reaction is not as lengthy.
Sure there will be tenderness in the area for a length of time depending on where the piercing is. Nipples often will take an extended period of time before the painful tenderness turns to increased sensitivity. With genital piercings normal sexual activity maybe uncomfortable for a period of time. However, like all piercings this is a temporary situation and once the piercing has healed the discomfort will be gone.
Whenever I have a client that is stressed and fearful of the pain, I try to always drill in the idea that if there is pain, it will be temporary. Often a few seconds or minutes of discomfort for a life time of enjoyment.
Though it might seem surprising to most, genital piercings and sexual piercings have been part of the human experience for sometime. This is especially true in the Island Tribes of Southeast Asia and in India. Who have been piercing their genitals as a rite of passage or to improve sexual pleasure for thousands of years. In fact, male genital piercings being done for the pleasure of female partners is even mentioned in the Kama Sutra.
However, like most piercings other than nipple piercings, hasn’t made its way into Western culture until the late 20th century. With the spread and rise of the Body Piercing industry there has been a study growth in the number of people with nipple or genital piercings.
Sex is at the heart of the human experience and in a lot of ways is one of our strongest motivating factors. Humans are one of the few creatures that have sexual intercourse for reasons other than to reproduce. We have sex as a bounding ritual, to express our emotional attachment to another person, to experience pleasure and countless other reasons but at the heart of it, it just feels good. Piercing sexual areas and erogenous areas of the body, can increase sensitivity or interaction with your partner or your own body to increase pleasure. Think of it as a sex toy that is always attached to your body.
However there are some genital piercings like for example scrotum piercings that offer little or no stimulation for the wearer or his partner. They are more decorative then functional. Which I should add could be said about a majority of body piercings. The motivation is often about customizing the look and feel of the piercee’s body than sexual gratification. For some it also may represent like a majority of piercings, a rite of passage into adulthood. In fact, the practice of genital piercings had been part of manhood rituals in Southeast Asia Island tribes long before modern piercing started.
Sometimes it’s simply about putting a spark back into your relationship. The first set of female nipples I did when I started piercing in Des Moines was on a 65 year old lady. Outwardly she came across as a sweet grandmother and I was a little taken aback when she said she wanted the piercing but she quickly explained that she wanted to surprise her husband of 40 years and put some spark back in their love life. It is not unusual for couples to come in and get a set of genital piercings to mark an anniversary or another event to bond their relationship.
Another reason is something for deep reaching. Like tattoos and other body modifications, one might be motivated by some life changing event. Often something very personal that can in some cases be about reclaiming of one’s body. I will be getting into the theory of sex abuse and genital piercings below a little bit but often when the subject of motivation comes up with my clients, the piercing represents ownership to them. That by getting the piercing they are stating, this is my body and only I control it. Often this is after breaking up with an over controlling partner or in a few cases the piercing was part of the healing process after being sexually assaulted.
Another often overlooked motivation is that the piercings are easy to conceal under clothing since they are not located in areas of the body that we generally don’t expose to anyone were are not intimate with. Over the years I’ve had a number of clients that do to their profession, they could not have visible piercings but still had a strong need or desire to get piercings. As a compromise, they got piercings below the neck to fulfill their desire. I’ve often been surprised at the number of clients I’ve had over the years that worked in high profile extremely conservative professions. Doctors, politicians. attorneys, judges, CEOs. etc…
When genital and nipple piercings began to become more wide spread and mainstream there were a number of physiological studies that claimed that the piercings were a form of genital mutilation triggered by sexual abuse. One study went as far as to stating that a large percentage of those with genital piercings were in fact the victims of sexual abuse and/or sexual assault. A number of years ago I had a lengthy discussion with a physiologist about this when she discovered that I had genital piercings. Her automatic reaction was that I had been sexually abused as a child. When I told her in no uncertain terms that I hadn’t, she claimed that I must be suppressing the experience.
If you would have done a search for the study 15 years ago, you would have come up with a number of reference but I couldn’t find one now. So, this might not be factual but as I understood the study was done on individual that were being treated for sexual abuse. So, of course some of them had genital piercings. The other problem was that at the time that they considered any form of tattooing, piercing or body art as a form of self mutilation and antisocial behavior. That thinking has gone out of the window since pretty much every form of body art is no longer fringe activity but mainstream.
Getting A Genital Or Nipple Piercing Is A Sexual Experience:
I think just about every male friend and even a few female friends have expressed that I have the best job ever. The reality is that performing a either type of piercing is not sexual to me at all. An experience piercer is both desensitized to the experience and so focused on what they are doing, there piercing is no more sexually stimulating than piercing an ear lobe. This is why choosing your piercer is important. Not only are both genital and nipple piercings very relent on anatomy and require skill to do correctly but they need to have the experience to be able to focus on what they are doing and make you feel comfortable.
Of course, being the piercee is a completely different experience and it all comes down to your mindset. One thing you will notice is that the whole procedure should be very clinical and if you have had other piercings, you will notice little or no difference in the experience. It’s designed that way. Except maybe the exposure of areas of the body that you wouldn’t normally show a stranger. Which regardless of your body image can been a variable and uncomfortable situation. Understand that your piercer has seen all this before and if they have been doing it as long as I have, seen just about every shape, size and style the human body comes in.
Over the years I have read numerous accounts of piercees gaining sexual gratification from getting a piercing. I have to say from my own experience this wasn’t the case but you have to understand that your mind and mindset has more to due with the experience than anything else. It might be their personal sexual interests or some other contributing factor. We are all wired differently and experience the world differently. So, experience it your way and don’t worry about your piercer’s reaction. If you choose the right piercer, he will react professionally regardless of how you react. The thing is though most of us do not find the thought or the experience of pain as a sexual trigger. So, if you are worried it might happen chances are it won’t.
Sex During Healing:
When I go through my consultation for genital piercings, I always follow, “No exchanging of bodily fluids for 6 months.” with “That doesn’t mean no sex for six months but no sex without a latex barrier for six months.” The reason is that the piercing is an open wound and even after it is healed the tissue is very soft. So, even though daily soaks and cleaning may not be needed, there is a possible chance of damaging the thin new scar tissue and exchanging bodily fluids with your sexual partner. For this reason, I strong suggest using a latex barrier for at least double the normal healing time or six months.
More commonly I get asked how soon can one have sex after getting the piercing? The answer is as soon as it is comfortable. That varies greatly from person to person and if the sexual activity is painful, it should be stopped. Often depending on the piercing, changing position, technique or stimulation can avoid pain and abuse to the fresh piercing. Usually pain means abuse.
Also only water based lubricants should be used and spermicides should be completely avoided until the piercing is healed. With male genital piercings that are located on the shaft of the piercing may require large or loss fitting condoms. During oral sex with a female genital piercing dental dams should be used. The only source that always have them is Planned Parenthood. If hands are going to be used, latex gloves is often the best option. For male genital piercings that can not be covered with a condom, using water proof bandages is the best option.
After sex it is always best to clean the piercing under running water and use a mild soap. I would also suggest urinating after cleaning and after sex.
Safe Sex And STDs:
Even after a genital piercing is completely healed, you are at a higher risk for contracting STDs than someone without genital piercings. The reasons are that the piercing tissue which is scar tissue is more fragile than normal tissue and the jewelry is more likely to add stress to the tissue during sexual activity. This is especially true if the piercing has direct contact during the activity or the jewelry hangs away from the body or is easily hooked. So, what’s the answer? Practice safe sex whenever switching partners. Also if you encounter a new partner with genital piercings, do the same.
With any piercing there are risk involve but not always ones that may effect one’s sex life. My approach to piercing has always been, Do No Harm. There are a number of genital piercings that with the right anatomy carry very little risk. Others however do not and require a very special and select anatomy structure to heal correctly and avoid damage to nerves. One that comes to mind is the Clitorus piercing. Often I have a client come in and request this piercing when in fact what she is wanting is clitoral hood. The clitorus itself is often not big enough to be pierced safely. It contains a large amount of nerves and if the piercing isn’t placed correctly, it can cause nerve damage. For that reason, I will not do it.
Anatomy is often the biggest factor of whether or not the piercing can or should be done. With many do not be surprised if your piercer asks to evaluate the area before hand. Not only to make a correct jewelry selection but to insure the piercing can be done safely. This might involve a hands on evaluation because with some piercings the structure needed isn’t visible. A skilled and experienced piercer can quickly figure out whether the piercing is a good idea or not. If the piercing is not possible they can explain other options.
Many of the genital piercings that are done today have a long history of success with quick easy healing and very limited risks. However, experimental or extreme piercing may include a great deal more risk and thus a great deal more experience doing that piercing. Like with any piercing, when considering a piercer, bring up the subject of risks and ask point blank about their personal experience doing that piercing. More experience almost always means less painful, less risks and better results.
Numbness And Newness:
With some piercings the piercee will often notice a heightened level of sensitivity and sensation right after the piercing is done or heal and then over time the effect seems to lessen. This is especially true of Clitoral Hood piercings where there are a number of factors at work. The first being that especially with the vertical hood piercing the jewelry is in contact with the clitorus in an area that is normally shielded by the hood. Over time the exposure to this sensitive area reduces the sensation. Now whether this is an actual numbing of the area or just the body adapting to the stimulation is unknown.
One needs to consider that the largest and most affecting organ in sexual gratification is the brain. The newness of the piercing and the how the piercing feels may have more to do with the sexual gratification that one gets from the piercing than the actual piercing. As humans, new experiences and sensations tend to be more intense than experiences ones. Over time as the newness of the piercing wares off and gets to the point where it is completely normal, so of that excitement reduces. In part it might just be our mind’s become used to the idea.
A sexual piercing can bring a great deal of joy to the piercee and their partner. It is another level that one can add to their life experience. Whether it be for sexual gratification, marking an event or a claiming of one’s sexuality it can be an empowering and joyful experience. The key is research, finding the right piercer and the right piercing for you. People are often surprised that the piercing experience has turned from a dreaded fearful event to a fun entertaining event but that’s what it should be. Piercing is fun and the best piercings are the ones you can share with those that matter in your life. Sexual piercings are those piercing you share with the people that you are most connected to. So, have fun, share your life experience and above all be safe.